Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mother's Day!

Mother's Day is such a hard day for so many & when I awoke this morning my heart ached for all the ladies, my sisters (sisters-in-infertility), who dread this day. I don't dread it as much, suffering from secondary infertility, as my sisters with primary infertility do but my heart breaks for all of us... all of us who long to be the mother of another child or even a mother to a child, all of the mother's who have lost a child, & all those who suffer from both infertility and pregnancy loss.

Every time I think of Mother's Day & the barren womb I can't help but think of a story I read on a friend's blog... it really puts this day in perspective for me. I hope this story touches you as much as it did me...

I read a story about a woman that had never married. She avoided the Mother's Day service at her church for 7 years because she so longed to be called a mother. She had dreamed of being a mother all of her life. The Sunday came when she felt that it was time to attend that dreaded "Mother's Day" service as a tool to aid in her own healing as a woman that would never become a mother. (she had recently had a hysterectomy in her early 40s) She forced herself up the steps of the church and into the parlor where she was greeted by an eager young boy handing out flowers to all of the mothers. She politely turned down the flower, telling the young boy that she was indeed, not a mother. She turned around with tear filled eyes to go up to the balcony when a woman her age, stopped her and said, "You most certainly ARE a mother- you are a spiritual mother and mentor to my daughter". The woman waved the little boy back over to the barren woman and with hands shaking- she accepted the flowers. She enjoyed, that day, her very first mother's day service.
Bringing Home Baby: What is a mother?

And to anyone who has lost a child way too early, I read this poem on another friend's blog earlier this afternoon & started crying. It is absolutely beautiful!
I thought of you and closed my eyes, And prayed to God today. I asked what makes a Mother, And I know I heard him say: A mother has a baby, This we know is true. But, God, can you be a mother, When your baby's not with you? Yes, you can he replied, With confidence in his voice. I give many women babies, When they leave is not their choice. Some I send for a lifetime, And others for a day. And some I send to feel your womb, But there's no need to stay. I just don't understand this God, I want my baby here. He took a breath and cleared his throat, And then I saw a tear. I wish that I could show you, What your child is doing today, If you could see your child smile, With other children who say: We go to earth and learn our lessons, Of love and life and fear. My mommy loved me oh so much, I got to come straight here. I feel so lucky to have a mom, Who had so much love for me. I learned my lessons very quickly, My mommy set me free. I miss my mommy oh so much, But I visit her each day. When she goes to sleep, On her pillow's where I lay. I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek, And whisper in her ear. "Mommy don't be sad today, I'm your baby and I'm here." So you see my dear sweet one, Your children are Ok. Your babies are here in My home, They'll be at heavens gate for you. So now you see what makes a mother. It's the feeling in your heart. It's the love you had so much of, Right from the very start. Though some on earth may not realize you are a mother, until their time is done. They'll be up here with Me one day, And you'll know that you're the best one. Happy mothers day, because you are a mother and you always will be!
What will be, will be: Happy Mothers Day

And last but not least, our church service this morning was AWESOME. This song (When I Cry) from the Gaither Vocal Band was sung & it really stood out to me. I'm sure it ministered to many souls this morning... I sure know it did mine! =)

God cries when we cry. He hurts when we hurt. When we lose someone close to us (our angel babies), He feels the pain too.

I pray for my brothers and sisters-in-infertility often & have been thinking a lot of you today. Happy Mother's Day to all the physical and spiritual moms and may God give you peace & strength each day.

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