Thanksgiving! =)

Wow, what a difference a year makes! I remember a year ago yesterday was a really hard day for me. We had our Thanksgiving fellowship service at church yesterday & a year ago that happened to fall shortly after I had first been referred to the RE, which was a really low point on this journey for me. I thought this trying to conceive journey was over for us b/c seeing an RE meant mucho moolah, which we don't have. It was around that time (well shortly after) that we decided to take a medical assistance break & wait on the Lord but I remember that morning's service like it was yesterday... I was in tears in the middle of our praise & worship, hoping & praying that no one saw my pain. I could barely sing anything b/c my heart hurt so much. I think I hid it from everyone pretty well except for my best friend who obviously caught on.

Yesterday's service was so much better though... it was a happy time for me. Yeah, I still want a baby but the Lord is growing my faith & trust in Him by leaps & bounds over the past year. I am so very thankful for that & for all His provisions. He is ALWAYS providing... just recently, new tires on my car & the means to pay for them. I am thankful for the way that He is changing both myself & my husband's heart. He is obviously preparing both of us for GREAT things. I can't believe the changes I have seen in both of us... we are both growing closer to God AND to each other. And that just reminds me of a quote that I recently found online that has quickly become a favorite:

"When God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better. The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."
~ Author Unknown

I'm so glad that we have such a big & awesome God & I am so very thankful for His grace, mercy, provisions, & protection even when we can't see the road ahead of us. Speaking of not being able to see the road ahead, our insurance is about to change in 2011 but I am not stressing. Instead I am trusting God & leaning on Him. It could easily be a very scary time... will the new insurance cover Follistim? And if so, will it cost the same or more (or maybe even less)? I don't know but I know that God will see us through this.

G sang an AMAZING song that really really spoke to my heart yesterday during our Thanksgiving service as well that I just have to share...

Thank you Lord, for the way that you love us! How you love us. I love you so much... more than anything & more than my desire to have a baby.